Oh!

What’s that?

Peaches looks startled as something looks like it’s hopping across the trail. I think: a toad! But when I look again, I see it’s a mole, stopping and starting as it wends its way over the dry, dry trail.

I’m guessing the poor mole couldn’t find or make his usual hole in the ground. It scurried under some pine needles. I just hoped it would find it’s way. The woods are parched.

(View from Whitten in July)

(Much dryer now.)

That’s the sad news.

The good news is that I had a really good week: finding lovely people with the skills to help with with both my Lyme – that will take a while still – and my sore hip. That too is going to be a long haul, even after all this time. But the difference is my hope and the confidence I feel in the practitioners.

Years ago, when I when I found myself living alone in NH – something I hadn’t planned for – it hadn’t occurred to me that I would feel lonely in the fall and winter after the full house in summer. That i’d miss my Brookline community. I’d never lived in such isolation. I had grown up on a farm in Va. and my parents valued independence. Even though the family was large (8 of us) what they admired was those that were independent. To NOT need – that was what was valued.

So why was I so uncomfortable? My solution: to run. And then run more. I loved running. But then I caught Lyme, and in the 4 years before it was diagnosed, the running became more and more uncomfortable.

Asia Suler suggests that illness is a teacher. Did it take Lyme to teach me that … I DO need people.

I’m so happy that Jonathan will be spending the winter in a building a stone’s throw away. I’m so glad I’ll be seeing my dear friend Jan so often. I look forward to my Tai Chi group. I’m so happy that I will be interacting with these practitioners that I truly believe are going to help me heal. Everyone – and more, so key for me.

But, you know what? You who read my blog posts: you feel like supportive friends. I think of you (feel you?) even as I write.

And I treasure that.

Would I have learned this without Lyme? I picture myself still running endlessly. That was how I solved that lack, that fear, that loneliness. I ran. And ran.

I still wish I could run. But thank goodness Lyme brought me something that running never did. Such an appreciation for my friends in NH. And such an appreciation for you.

(lying flat)

raining blue?

blue crescendo?

May we all have an uplifting winter!